(Who) To be, or Not to be

That is the question.

"Who am I?" This is a question that has either plagued or intrigued philosophers and laymen alike since time immemorial. There are various ways to approach this root of many an existential conundrum, but a surprisingly simple yet accurate way of narrowing down who you are or wish to be is by taking the time to introspect who you are not.

Try this thought experiment:

Make a list of all that you don’t want from your life. Specifically look for things that don't appeal to you, don't represent who you think you are and choices you consciously steered clear of.

If you find it difficult to come up with things naturally, use the following questions as a guideline:

• What kind of career would you never opt for, even as your last option?

• What kind of person do you try to ensure that you will never become?

• What characteristics, qualities or traits in a potential friend or partner would put you off?

• Which social cause are you least likely to help or work for?

Tip: If you would like to take your exploration a step further, follow up your initial answers with “I would rather…” and see what comes up.

Do: ask “why?” in response to your answers to these questions. This could help you gauge what motivates you. What you don’t want or wish to avoid indirectly says a lot about what you actually do value, as well as the things you are afraid of.

Do not: get carried away by notions of how socially acceptable what you think is.

As always, it is a personal and reflective exercise to enhance your self-awareness.